The dilemma of mothers as working women

Mothers are facing problems when it comes to work

The dilemma of mothers as working women
Image Source - https://commons.wikimedia.org/wiki/File:A_Cambodian_mother_and_son.jpg
History has related to us the picture that women more often than not belong at home tending to the household and children. However, in the last century we have seen women pushing more and more for a place in the working environment.

Over and over we read, watch documentaries or movies and see where it is depicted that women belong at home. Many cultures were built on that premise, the men would go out to the field and factories to work, while the women would stay at home, tending to the household, cooking, cleaning, taking care of the children and when the husbands get home, take of them too. Back then societies thrive in such an organization. There is barely any record of women complaining about the structure back then. However, in today’s society women feel trapped and neglected if asked to stay home to wash, cook, clean, tend to the children and husbands. There are some men today who still prefer such an arrangement and they look for women who are willing to take up the task.

Sadly, they are finding it difficult to find such a mate.

In the extremism of feminism and women power, there is a loud cry for women to be independent. I have no problem with women being independent. The problem is in their zeal for independence, they lack interdependence. Women are nurturers, there is no going around about that. So until the end of time they will always be the ones expected to nurse and raise a child whether or not a father is present. Women want to have a job or career outside the home. Fine, go ahead, go for it. However, their most important and crucial job and career will and must be the role as mother.

In ancient of times mothers knew how important they were in their position in the family, tribe, and history as a whole. Not just to give birth, but to ensure that their child or children received the necessary education and skills in order for them to continue the legacy of the family, tribe and their particular history. There are tales of mothers who put their own lives on the line so that their children receive what’s rightfully theirs. Mothers of ancient history also were not weak. They had to know how to fight, they had to know how to survive, and they had to know how to withstand hardship. If there was war and the men went to battle, if the home was under threat, mothers came together, gather the children and lead them to safety. Whether the men found them was not the primary issue, it was protecting the children for as we love to say now, “they are the future.” There were mothers who were warriors and of course chieftains, empresses, princesses and even queens. These were no simple walking around jobs or positions. The primary duty was protecting the realm. The realm would be of no purpose without an heir or heiress. And who make sure there is an heir or heiress? Mothers of course.

Nowadays, many women have college/university degrees. Some want and do have children because to them that is what an ideal family looks like. However, many children suffer and lack the nurturing that is essential from a mother. Why? Because these mothers have neglected those duties for the “job/career world.” In other words, these type of mothers have not mastered the skills of management and balance. These mothers love to tell their kids, “I have to work, sweetheart, so mommy can make a better life for us.” These mothers then get upset at the children for not understanding. The truth is the only thing children in these situations understand is that their mother is not around, that their mother has chosen her work over them, that they are not enough for their mother and the worst of all, “mommy does not love me.”

So mothers or women wanting to become mothers, learn the skill of management and balance if you want to take on duties outside the family arena. And most of all be careful of the messages you send to your children.


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Post Your Comment

You show great wisdom:) And yes, a mother does need to fill that place in her children's life, 100% as a homemaker.

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It is not an easy task, but respectfully, a woman should take on that responsibility if they are not ready. Commitment and management is essential in being fruitful on this path of life.

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The key is to balance the two world and it definitely becomes a big stress on women. With the changing lifestyle and world moving towards a more urban culture, double income becomes a necessity at times than just being a social status or luxury. Women have been nurturers since ages but not to forget that men can be equally good at that job if they shed off their prejudices. So whatever, a woman choses..to be a working woman/housewife/part time worker...depending on her priorities should be respected and not judged through narrow lenses. Men can come forward to share the load and that will benefit both.

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Men should be included especially since they are apart of the process. But couples should not spend their every moment playing the blame game.

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